Heard around the house

Hypertot: Daddy, Daddy! Curtain Climber's on the table!
Daddy: Ok, I'm coming.
Hypertot: No, it's not ok! Curtain Climber's on the table!

Ah, the little literalist.

Note to Hypertot

I don't care how much you like or dislike bar soap. You can't wash your hands with toothpaste.

Note to Monkeytot

Remember when I said you couldn't put a bandage in your nose? I'm sorry, but you can't put one in your mouth, either. It just won't work.

Note to Monkeytot

No, you can't put a bandage in your nose, even if it is bleeding.

Note to Monkeytot

I don't think you'll have much success slicing the cheddar cheese with a plastic wrench. Sorry. And no, you may not grab a sharp knife to do it with instead. And NO, the hunk is not for biting directly into.

Since the MSM only finds it funny when conservatives say things like this...

we're left to spread it around ourselves.


Please share this!

Note to Hypertot

That's not a wrist brace. No, no, don't put it back in the bathroom cupboard where you found it; just go ahead and throw it away.

Note to Hypertot

Convention holds that the "magic word" is please, not abracadabra. Really.

Note to Hypertot

Honeybunch, you are indeed "allowed" to go to your room, and I suggest you go when told, regardless of your misconception. No, sending you there doesn't make Daddy a bad person, nor a bank robber, as you so eloquently stated, and I seriously doubt he's going to go to jail as a result. But nice try.

Note to Hypertot

I think it's great that you learned how to make your own peanut butter sandwiches; but do you think you could use a butter knife, instead of a plastic toy dagger?

Count 'em

I just thought I'd share with you the haiku my son wrote.

Five syllable line
Line with seven syllables
Five syllable line

That's just the kind of humor he has. If you find it amusing, you might check out his blog.

And now we return you to your regularly scheduled blogger.

David Nathan

I guess you gotta be careful whom you believe on April Fools Day, and whom you let have your blog password!

Dear, sweet hubbie... loveable yet unmanageable prankster... was delighted that our David Nathan was born on April Fools Day. So excited, in fact, that he began calling family members while I slept after childbirth. He told them that our 8 lb 12 oz boy was over 14 lbs, and that we'd given him the middle name Jessica. Most people were too polite to ask why on earth we'd choose a name like Jessica for a boy. My youngest sister asked outright, and after hearing his bogus explanation said "You are so full of it. It's April Fools Day." She had to reassure my family that no, I hadn't given birth to a whale with a girl's name.

And then he goes home for a shower, and posts to my blog.

But I wouldn't trade 'im for the world. I couldn't handle life with a husband who lacked a sense of humor, and let's face it: he makes good babies.

Thanks for the good wishes and prayers. We're all doing well, and working at forgetting the 33 hours of labor. And Davy's worth it.

He's Here!

Born after 33 hours of labor, at 12:45 this afternoon. After wrangling for weeks over names, we finally settled on David Jessica. He was 20 inches and weighed 14 lb. 8 oz. Should have been named "Ouch!" Thanks for the prayers!